Ramblings of Silver Blue

Ira and Esther Goldberg had a large family of seven healthy children. They moved to America from Europe and were having a difficult time finding an apartment to live in. Many apartments were large enough, but the landlords objected to such a large family. After several days of unsuccessful searching, Ira asked Esther to take [...]

A husband and a wife are waiting at the bus stop, and with them are their nine children. A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find that it is overloaded and only the wife and nine kids are able to fit in the bus. So the husband and [...]

A guy traveling through the prairies of the USA stopped at a small town and went to a bar. He stood at the end of the bar, ordered a drink, and lit up a cigar. As he sipped his drink, he stood there quietly blowing smoke rings. After he blew nine or ten smoke rings [...]

Unanswered Prayers ( Pat Alger- Larry Bastian – Garth Brooks ) Just the other night at a hometown football game, My wife and I ran into my old high school flame, And as I introduced them the past came back to me, And I couldn’t help but think of the way things used to be. [...]

Here’s the final part of the 2004 chart: Positions 10-1. All samples are FM quality, in Real Audio format (all around 300K each). Position Song/Artist 10. Friend – Christine McVie 9. Dead Disco (Kylie Kills Mix) – The Metrics 8. Into The West (Acoustic Edit) – Annie Lennox 7. Gueri De Toi – Sarah Brightman [...]

Another return. Bourbon Fruitcake Cookies 1/2 cup butter or margarine, softened 1 cup firmly packed brown sugar 4 large eggs 1 teaspoon ground nutmeg 1 teaspoon ground mace 1 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon 3 cups flour, divided 1/2 cup baking soda 3 tablespoons buttermilk 1/2 cup bourbon 1 cup raisins, seedless 1 pound chopped pecans [...]

“Piece of Heaven” 1/3 oz Goldschlager 1/3 oz Kahlua Coffee Liqueur 1/3 oz Milk Shake all ingredients together with ice, pour into a shot glass, and serve.

Tommy’s house is packed with relatives for Christmas dinner. Grandpa calls 6 year old Tommy and starts asking about school, girlfriends and other stuff he can think of. After a while, grandpa notices that Tommy is losing interest in the conversation so he pulls out two bills from his wallet to see if he can [...]

1. From Our House To Yours – Lorrie Morgan 2. Christmas Is Almost Here – Carly Simon 3. Let It Be Christmas – Alan Jackson 4. Heavenly Peace – Johnny Mathis 5. The Lost Christmas Eve – Trans-Siberian Orchestra 6. It Wouldn’t Be Christmas (Without You) – John Tesh 7. Hark! The Hearld Angels Sing [...]

The shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST DEALS.He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading LOWEST PRICES.The shopkeeper was panicked, until he got an [...]

Here’s the fourth part of the 2004 chart: Positions 20-11. All samples are FM quality, in Real Audio format (all around 300K each). Position Song/Artist 20. Amazing – George Michael 19. I Wish I Knew… – Sharlene Hector 18. Anytime, Anyplace, Anywhere – Nena & Kim Wilde 17. What You See Is What You Don’t [...]

A sister and brother are talking to each other when the little boy gets up and walks over to his Grandpa and says, “Grandpa, please make a frog noise.” The Grandpa says, “No.” The little boy goes on, “Please…please make a frog noise.” The Grandpa says, “No, now go play.” The little boy then says [...]

If IBM ran Christmas… They would want one big Santa, dressed in blue, where kids queue up for their present-processing. Receiving presents would take about 24-36 hours of mainframe processing time. If Microsoft ran Christmas… Each time you bought an ornament, you would have to buy a tree as well. You wouldn’t have to take [...]

Thanks to this post from Ted, I’m forced to say: Let’s face it, you know the Mystery Machine only smelled of two things: cold pizza and stale ass.

Christmas Stays The Same (words and music by Frank Wildhorn & Jack Murphy) Performed by Linda Eder Santa Claus and mistletoe Carols by the fire Send a card and spread a little Christmas cheer Silent night a fall of snow Listen to the choir Everyone is happy that it’s here For we all remember, some [...]

Thanks to Tink for forwarding this. The Top 9 Signs You’re at a *Really* Lame Office Christmas Party 9> The “open bar” referred to on the invitation is the one across the street and down the block. 8> Instead of platters of hors d’ouevres, there are discount prices at the lunchroom vending machines. 7> Somebody’s [...]

When a coworker comes in a little to happy singing “good morning” to everyone and you think, “Somebody need to slap the sh*t out of her…You need to pray at work When someone comes in and announces, “office meeting in 5 minutes,” and you think, “what the f..k do they want now.”……..You need to pray [...]

You’re A People’s History of the United States! by Howard Zinn After years of listening to other peoples’ lies, you decided you’ve had enough. Now you’re out to tell it like it is, with all the gory details and nothing left out. Instead of respecting leaders, you want to know what the common people have [...]

Bush picks champion of breakfasts for Commerce The Virginian-Pilot © December 1, 2004 From: The White House 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. Washington, D.C. To: Carlos Gutierrez, chief executive officer The Kellogg Co. Battle Creek, Mich. Nov. 29, 2004 Dear Carlos: Thank you for joining my Cabinet as secretary of commerce. I’m sure you’ll do a K-E-Double-L, [...]